Today’s Daily Prompt asks for a time when the odds were completely stacked against me. I’m struggling to come up with something, and I think it’s because I don’t see life through a lens of “fair” and “not fair”. Statistics is a math form, and nothing more. It has no real substance in the world.
I mean, all the odds were stacked against me that I’d fail my midterm on Linear Regression last week, but I probably did, so I don’t think that counts.
But really, think about it. Are the odds really ever stacked against us? Sometimes, I guess. Like at a casino. But life is just life. Stuff happens as it will, and our job is to take it when it does, and if we can, take it with a smile. The odds have never been stacked against me any more than they have been stacked against someone else. Life’s not fair, they say – I say it is. We all have a chance of walking outside today and being hit by a bus. That’s just how it goes. It sucks, but we’re all equally likely to get screwed today.
When I think about my accomplishments, I think I worked hard, I met my deadlines, I stayed organized. I worried myself into a stupor. I practiced interviews in my head over and over, I sent my assignments to my sister to proofread, I stayed up all night thinking that maybe my shockwaves of anxiety would somehow change the course of the future. That was the part in my control. The rest was outside of my control, and that part is not worth thinking about.
Let me put it this way: Probability is not as meaningful as we think it is. If you flip a coin, the odds of heads VS tails are 50/50. If you flip a coin 100 times, you expect to get 50 heads and 50 tails. What will you actually get? You could get any number of things. You could get 100 heads. And it wouldn’t mean that the probability is wrong – it would just mean that you didn’t understand what probability meant in the first place. The universe has no laws about probability. Probability is expectation on such a large scale that you could not flip enough coins in your lifetime to legitimately reach a 50/50 ratio. All the coins in the world could be flipped right now, and all land on heads, and it wouldn’t mean probability is wrong. It would just mean that you didn’t flip enough coins (this is why you diversify your portfolio. Seriously, I just tied finance into this. I am so jaded.)
Anyway… apparently I don’t have hopes and dreams, I just have a sh**-eating grin, and with it I am ready to take on the world.
I’m such an INTJ. I hope everyone else has something more positive to say than this!